Category Archives: sport

Non-personalities hijack event intended for personalities… again

Zara Phillips, Darren Clarke and Beth Tweddle with their Sports Personality of the Year trophies
More evidence that you don’t actually need a personality to be eligible for the premier prize in British sport. Three blocks of wood (one with way too much hair gel) walked away with the top prizes at the BBC’s increasingly silly annual non-prize last night.

The British media and the public want so badly for these people to have personalities, it’s as if we’re all willing them to acquire one: “Come on Zara! You can do it! Be… you know… something… ANYTHING! You don’t have to just stand there!”

The BBC and its sponsors have built a vast and pointless superstructure of glitz and lights and hairspray around a perfect vacuum – a few dozen humourless sporting monomaniacs who wouldn’t know a personality if it mugged them during another punishing pre-dawn training session. Next year they’re going to honour actual blocks of wood.