My wife thinks I’m naive (or it might have been ‘stupid’ – I can’t remember). Anyway, I have a fantasy: Tony and Gordon are good mates. Really. They’ve been together too long to let a bit of professional rivalry come between them. Tony gets impatient with all that Presbyterian, son-of-the-manse bollocks and Tony’s high church mumbo jumbo makes Gordon feel slightly sick. Their wives don’t get on, of course, and they hate each other’s friends but, basically, they like and trust each other and they’re serious about working together to win the election and lead the country into a healthy, modern, fair and un-neurotic future. Of course, I could be wrong.