Greening eBay

So I’m unloading a few bits of old junk on eBay. One item is a spare battery for a defunct Powerbook and I get an enquiry from an Australian buyer: how much to ship the thing to Oz? I guess this illustrates the bizarre, nicely Gibsonian nature of the eBay economy. How can it possibly be economic for me to package and ship a used battery to the other side of the planet? Amazingly, it is. For the buyer it’ll be cheaper than getting a new one from a local supplier and, of course, buying something from an eBay seller with a good feedback rating (even one on the other side of the planet) is safer than buying it from somebody you found in the Yellow Pages.

So, item by item, eBayers are reordering the bottom end of the global marketplace – trading, building relationships, growing businesses, ignoring national borders (and, while they’re at it, bypassing national tax regimes).

This kind of casual globalisation may be cool but it’s hardly green. Single items, shipped by environmentally costly means (jet planes, mostly) with no regard for economies of scale or for negative externalities like damage to the environment or even for basic economics: eBay sellers usually aren’t counting the cost of their own time in listing and shipping goods, for instance – this is hobby capitalism. It might also go some way to explaining why the fastest growing airlines in the world are the ones with no windows.

So, eBay is an out-of-control environmental catastrophe and the bigger it gets the worse it gets, on a more-or-less linear scale (no economies of scale here, remember). Here’s the plan, then: eBay sellers sign up to add a ‘Carbon Neutral Trader’ button to their listings. eBay takes an extra tuppence in the pound (including some profit – this needs to be a real business) from your transaction and uses it to plant trees. Of course, there are computers involved, so there’s nothing to stop this being really quite sophisticated: sellers will opt in or out of the scheme transaction-by-transaction and the carbon deduction for each transaction will vary based on distance and shipping method: an inland postal delivery will be cheap, a round-the-world jet flight expensive, a personal pick-up free.

Buyers will participate too: just as you can now filter search results for listings from sellers who accept Paypal or who live in your area, you’ll be able to search solely for carbon neutral sellers. Your ‘carbon score’ will be listed alongside your feedback rating (I can see a little ‘magic tree’ symbol). The pressure to build your carbon score will grow as the scheme grows. The colour of your magic tree will change as you plant more trees. Super Sellers will pay for hundreds or thousands of trees. eBay will plant millions and, at the firm’s current rate of growth, the ‘eBay forest’ will probably save the planet.

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Cold terror

I won’t be the first person to link to this terrifying interview with a British jihadist. I promise, this interview will leave you open-mouthed with dread and amazement. This young man, from his comfortable home in Manchester, summarily revokes the right (or the expectation) of a British citizen to walk the streets (ride the trains and buses) without being randomly selected for death or mutilation by another British citizen.

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Space Brother

Switching between Big Brother Live (this has to be the best ever, right?) and NASA TV is entertaining. NASA’s 24/7 output is mind-blowing – a sort of hyper-purposeful parody of reality confinement shows like BB.

I can’t wait for week 10’s Big Brother Task, which is called ‘Crew Swap’. For 48 hours, Anthony, Craig, Makosi, Derek, Eugene and Kinga have to run the space shuttle (Makosi is captain) and the shuttle crew have to hang around picking their toes in the BB House. Naturally, during the 48 hours they have to do each other’s chores, so the shuttle crew will have to learn to ride a unicycle and make cheese on toast while the BB crew will have to repair the heat shield and replace a gyroscope on the ISS. Seriously, though, run NASA TV in the background and, every now and then, it’ll chirrup into life and tell you something you never knew. In the meantime, while you’re waiting for something to happen, you can see Earth’s best views in real time from a high orbit.

My kids, of course, are unimpressed. “These images are coming from 400km up there in space to dishes all over the planet, where they’re packaged up and sent to a studio in Florida (probably via space again) and then they’re edited and sent out to a web server somewhere and then across the Internet to us here. And all this happens in half a second”. “yes Dad. Can you find the Cartoon Network web site for me?” I suppose that’s what happens: the only people impressed by new technology are the ones who know what it’s actually doing – the old-timers. We exist in a permanent glow of awe and amazement. Everyone else sort of vaguely assumes that’s what computers have been doing since about 1970…

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